Wednesday, December 1, 2010

ROCK the BELLS PPV

Cue "We Are One". As the first official entrance theme of the night it draws an immediate pop... but then stunned confusion as fans pause to ponder who is actually entering.

Enter DAVID OTUNGA!



He's accompanied by a white trash bimbo with blonde hair and a pair of Daisy Dukes. Some of the seedier fans recognize her as Jessica Darlin. Otunga is dressed for business tonight, and takes the mic center-ring.

DAVID OTUNGA: [Sighs] It's difficult just being an A-Lister in general. It’s so hard to look like I do and just go about my daily life. You don’t understand, I have to go to the gym and maintain my looks but it’s not even just that. With my face, people don’t understand that the reason I wear sunglasses to the ring and when I’m around town is that I don’t know if you’ve ever looked me in the eye or just seen my eyes but they’re pretty unique. They’re a unique shade of light brown – almost what I would call hazel, but not quite – and I have to say they’re the two most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. When I look someone in the eye they are immediately smitten with me (makes googly eyes with Jessica Darlin, who swoons). Well, you know, an A-List star like myself, I have to go to different out of the way places to relax and enjoy myself and kind of get away from the ordinary people. Different out of the way places such as Broken City Championship Wrestling.

Otunga declares he is here in BCCW to make a permanent impact on pro wrestling history. His statement begins tonight when he presents the newest addition to the woman's championship title scene. Looks at Jessica Darlin who giggles and bounces mindlessly.

DAVID OTUNGA: It seems like everything I do gets a lot of media coverage. That was just one little thing I said and it’s kind of crazy how people just jumped on it and ran with it. I can’t be held accountable for people looking me in the eye and falling in love with me. I try to wear sunglasses to shield people because they’re just not ready for this. With the A-List lifestyle there’s a lot of demands placed on me: everywhere I go people want to stop and take pictures, get autographs, and luckily I’m cool with that. I will sign every autograph and take every picture without turning anyone away. That can take up a lot of my time trying to get somewhere, but that’s just how I am – I value my fans and I give a lot to them....
Introducing...

But before Otunga can utter another self-absorbed syllable, "You Make the Rain Fall" by Kevin Rudolf interrupts him!


Enter NAOMI NIGHT!!!



She looks like a glam rock goddess and bounces to the ring to a large pop. Otunga and Darlin exchange quizzical glances in the ring. Naomi Night takes center ring and address Otunga to his eye. Unlike him she's earned everything she got in BCCW and pro wrestling, and if anybody is going to hijack the woman's championship scene it's going to be her - Naomi Night! (stares hard at Jessica Darlin) Instigates a fight and quickly the ring is cleared for a brief scuffle.


*DARK MATCH* NAOMI NIGHT versus JESSICA DARLIN (w/ David Otunga)

versus with

Quick match; enough time to showcase Naomi Night's intensity but not enough to display any of her opponents shortcomings. Naomi wins with a corkscrew bicycle kick in short order and preens for the appreciative audience. David Otunga is just shaking his head outside the ring. But he's not shaking it out of shame or disbelief... it's a look of pity for Naomi!

WINNER: Naomi Night

Suddenly, Night is ambushed from behind and absolutely crushed by a monster of a woman!

Enter BULL NAKANO!!!



She smashes Naomi Night into little pieces while Otunga (with the biggest shit-eating smirk you've ever seen) enters the ring to direct traffic. Somersault guillotine leg drop off the top rope from Nakano! Night is finished!

DAVID OTUNGA (has the mic again): (gestures to Nakano standing beside him) You can’t learn it either – you either have it or you don’t. We definitely have it, and everyone else doesn’t. I can learn the in-ring skills, and we Harvard Law guys are very fast learners, so I pick things up quickly. But everyone else … they can’t learn what I have. Keep watching me, because I already know that everyone tunes in to BCCW to watch me. I’m David Otunga, the A-Lister a.k.a. The Real Total Package... (gestures to Nakano and Darlin around him) And we are "FOCUS". You will not be disappointed.

Otunga directs Darlin to set up Naomi Night for one more crushing top rope leg drop from Nakano - a move that could surely incapacitate the young contender. Suddenly, a man with black trunks and a black coat (with a mirror on the back) runs out from the locker room to make the save!

Enter CODY RHODES!!!



Rhodes runs in to the ring and covers Naomi's body from further harm. He waves Otunga and Nakano off. They look stunned that he would even attempt such a brazen action. Rhodes rolls Night out of the ring into the waiting arms of security and EMTs. Rhodes then takes center-ring and goes nose to nose with Otunga, backing him down! Rhodes is screaming at Otunga, threatening him to pack his shit and leave before he pounds him out. Otunga just shakes his head incredulously, glances into the audience... and SLAPS Rhodes in the face! Then high-tails it out of the ring! Rhodes immediately gives chase as our announcers for the evening are just taking their seats. But before Rhodes can even chase Otunga around the ring, he is CRUSHED by a lariat from an unseen foe! (when a wrestler hides around a corner of the ring to blind side a charging opponent) The man throws off his black hooded cloak to reveal a sweaty madman with a spiked dog collar around his neck with a leash hanging down his chest, and dark circles around each eye.

Enter DC DRAKE!!!



Drake and Otunga start stomping on Rhodes outside the ring as houselights and PPV camera men are taking position! It's almost air time!



 BCCW presents...

ROCK the BELLS!!!!
Introducing the announce team for this evening:


MSD and Matt Striker.

Cue event theme song:


David Otunga is in the ring to start the broadcast! He's surrounded by a hybrid crew of monsters, accentuated by the ditzy appearance of Jessica Darlin. Otunga has a mic






DAVID OTUNGA: BCCW
Champion. You don’t even have to finish the question. That’s where I want to be, and in a short time, that’s what I see. I don’t even think it will take that long, but that’s my dream and that’s what I’m pushing for. Not only am I going to take over BCCW but then I’m smashing through the door and I want to be Champion.



Introduces his faction as "FOCUS" and promises that tonight, their hostile takeover will continue!


1) CODY RHODES versus DC DRAKE (w/ David Otunga)

versus with


Rhodes already at a disadvantage from the prior beatdown, that announcers MSD and Striker recap for the viewing audience. DC Drake shows off his animal instincts, viciousness and utter disdain for human life. But finally, Rhodes begins his comeback and sticks it to Otunga watching on from ringside. Otunga had slid a steel chair until the ring, and now Cody was setting up DC Drake for a Cross-Rhodes onto the chair when Otunga hops up on the apron, distracting Rhodes and the ref. Steel chair from behind by DC Drake to Rhodes! Ring the bell! DQ! But Drake and Otunga don't stop pounding Rhodes with the steel chair till he's a quivering, unmoving mess. Then, in a shocking and gruesome display of aggression David Otunga holds Cody Rhodes while DC Drake flashes a switchblade and jigs Rhodes forehead, immediately drawing a torrent of blood! They're going to jab him again before security finally reacts and drags them away! MSD and Striker shocked and horrified on commentary!



WINNER: Cody Rhodes (by DQ)



2) MARK BRISCOE versus DUDLEY BOYZ
(BCCW tag team championship Handicap match)

versus
 


This match came about under strict protest from Mark Briscoe. After his brother was permanently injured by the Dudley Boyz in the Marciano Cup finals, Mark Briscoe has been on a vigilante mission - making unauthorized run-ins, cutting shoot promos on the Dudz and generally just acting like a loose cannon. He demanded a rematch with the Dudz, and even when the BCCW tag team champions said they would only accept the match if it was under handicap rules - Mark Briscoe still accepted. That's how deep his thirst for vengeance runs. But all the fighting spirit in the world isn't enough to overcome the BCCW tag team champions (aka "the best tag team in pro wrestling history, period - the rest of y'all are holding tag team tournaments for second place") as the Dudley Boyz gang up on Briscoe and crush him in short order. Valiant fight from Briscoe, but he's bloodied, beaten and driven through a table to end the match. Dudz take the mic and briefly cut a world domination promo.



WINNERS: Dudley Boyz


 
KING of the DEATH MATCH FINALS
3) JUN KASAI (w/ Atsushi Onita) versus MADMAN PONDO

with versus



WINNER (and NEW King of the Death Match champion): JUN KASAI!!!




With the wreckage being cleared from the ring, the spotlight falls upon a quaint French sitting room set on the entrance ramp. It's the set of BCCW's newest talk show!


Enter MR OOH LA LA!!!

 


Does a quick little crowd-pleasing schtick, introducing himself and his show. But he's quickly cut off by an abrasive voice off screen barking at him to shut up. Entering through the black curtains - why, it's none other than the Varsity Villain himself!!! And he's a got a mic!



Enter ALEX RILEY!!!



ALEX RILEY:
There’s no secret to beating Mr Ooh La La... he’s twice my size! Alex Riley is like a big rollercoaster, and Mr. Ooh La La is just not big enough to ride this ride. You're dismissed. (condescendingly waves Mr Ooh La La away from his own set, allowing Alex Riley to continue serenading the audience) First, there’s no doubt in my mind that this competition is already over and I’ve won it. You could end this show now because when I am ranked No. 1, that’s not going to change. I don’t think there’s anybody in this competition who can compete with me athletically, size-wise, entertainment-wise and on the microphone. I plan on changing the face of BCCW and I will not settle for anything else!



(Mr Ooh La La - after soaking it all in - casually removes his white riding glove and SLAPS Alex Riley across the face! The French death duel has been laid!


4) MR OOH LA LA versus ALEX RILEY

versus


Quick comedy match, with Alex Riley - the annoying Varsity Villain - receiving his comeuppance via various comedic antics. After being treated like a fool, Alex Riley finally takes over the match and the fun and games are finished. One TKO later and Alex Riley earns the pinfall victory. He takes the mic one final time to tell the crowd to kiss his ass.

 



ALEX RILEY: I shouldn't have to tell YOU. YOU should know I'M a Superstar!



Winner: ALEX RILEY



5) RICHIE STEAMBOAT (w/ Missy Hyatt) versus DR JERRY GRAHAM

with versus

Match came about after an announced visit from DR JERRY GRAHAM at "WRESTLEPALOOZA", where he debuted during Richie Steamboats victory. He literally stole Aksana by the hand away from Hot Stuff Inc. After the show, in the week leading up to "ROCK the BELLS", Graham was all over the media about illegal passports, forgery accusations, etc.... showering controversy and embarrassment upon Missy Hyatt and her Hot Stuff Inc company. Even when TMZ cameras managed to catch DR JERRY GRAHAM stealing his dead mothers corpse from the hospital at gunpoint (!!!), it still didn't deter him from his campaign of slander. Tonight, Missy Hyatt accompanies Steamboat to the ring while Dr Jerry Graham enters alone. Match is a stark contrast in styles, yet they mesh seamlessly. Steamboat takes to the air with high impact offense, drawing exaggerated reactions from the flamboyant Doctor. In the end, after Steamboat has gained the advantage and seems to be on the brink of victory... Aksana makes the run-in and interference, officially turning on Hot Stuff Inc and joining Dr Jerry Graham. He clobbers a distracted Steamboat with a whiskey bottle and pins him. Graham and Aksana join hands in victory and make their way backstage, while Hyatt helps Steamboat recover mid-ring.





Winner: DR JERRY GRAHAM (w/ Aksana)


 
6) FARMER BURNS ELYSIAN FIELDS EMPORIUM ("Yankee Doodle Dandy")

The set is center ring. A giant black-cloaked object resides in the background, like the atypical wrestling magazine cover reveal. Booger and Hornswoggle obey all commands with silent precision. Farmer Burns introduces himself and his show. He is being billed as "one of the most perfect specimens of physical man-hood that the generation has produced." (please purchase his book "Lessons in Wrestling & Physical Culture" in BCCW shopzone to learn how you can achieve the same results). He will demonstrate one of these daring feats today.

With a grand dramatic flourish (and mood music building to a crescendo), Burns and his assistants remove the huge black tarp to reveal - not a magazine cover - an actual gallows, complete with lone Hangmans noose!



To the crowds stunned amazement and awe, assistants Bastion Booger and Hornswoggle scramble to set up the spectacle, while Farmer Burns melodramatically prepares to be hung! In the grand climatic finish, Farmer Burns takes a stunning 6 foot Hangmans Drop to a loud crowd GASP.



He dangles there awkwardly for a moment; everybody fears the stunt may have gone awry. Suddenly... he starts whistling! The tune to "Yankee Doodle Dandy" floats through the now-silent arena, raising them to a massive CHEER!!! Farmer Burns neck is so strong, that he was able to perform a stunt where he would take a six-foot hangman's drop and while still in the air would whistle "Yankee Doodle Dandy." And this wasn't something he did just once. "Farmer" Burns did his famous hangman's drop dozens of times each week and thousands of people saw it. His neck is so powerful that what would have killed most men doesn't even phase him. Farmer Burns' "Lessons in Wrestling & Physical Culture" - on sale now.



"I am perfection!!!!!"


DOLPH ZIGGLER opens the next segment. Dressed like a million bucks, Diamond Dynasty Rolex and Million $$$ championship belt. Takes the ring and calls notice to himself. Recaps how he took over the Dynasty, took the Million $$$ title and is the hottest young prospect in the game... and yet he can't get a match at BCCW's biggest PPV "Rock the Bells". Travesty! Declares he will put up the Million $$$ belt in a spontaneous throwdown to anybody in the back who wants to step up and accept the challenge. TONIGHT. His call is answered by...


7) DOLPH ZIGGLER versus HAYSTACKS CALHOUN
versus
 


Ziggler taken aback by the arrival of the MASSIVE country boy. The gargantuan wrestler sports his trademark white T-shirt, blue overalls, and horseshoe necklace. Ziggler goes on the offense early, but is easily swatted away by the much larger man. But Ziggler can use his speed and agility to stick-and-move. We even get a brief sleeper hold from Ziggler on Calhouns. But in the end, they brawl outside the ring - Haystacks once again gets the upper hand and winds up pitching Dolph Ziggler back into the ring over the top rope like he was a bale of hay... but gets counted out before he can re-enter himself. Oh booooo, typical cowardly heel fashion yet Matt Striker is extolling the virtues of Ziggler's patience and intelligence on commentary.



Winner (and STILL Million $$$ champion): DOLPH ZIGGLER (by count-out)
(Million $$$ championship)



8) BATISTA versus SHEAMUS
versus


Major league PPV entrances for both men. In the realm of BCCW, Batista has been portrayed as a ruthless mercenary shoot fighter, and Sheamus as the babyface New Millennium Warrior. Titanic clash that takes both combatants all over the arena in a wild brawl. After a ref bump, use of the steel ring steps, and dueling steel chairs - the entire match is finally thrown out as a Pier 6 brawl erupts in the balcony between fans, quickly spreading to the lower levels. It's a near-riot in the Broken City Slaughtahouse! Police and fire Marshalls are in the building!!!



Winner: NOBODY (No Finish)



9) ALOISA the AMAZON versus TAMINA (w/ Uso's) versus
 


Aloisia the Amazon retain her title in an overwhelming display of power and aggression. Match is over in short order, and Aloisia puts an exclamation point on her performance when she gorilla presses Tamina out of the ring onto the Uso brothers - collapsing them all. HUGE cheers for the reigning champion.



Winner (and STILL WWW champion): ALOISIA the AMAZON
(World Woman's Wrestling championship)



10) KEN SHAMROCK (w/ Mitsuyo Maeda) versus DAN SEVERN
with versus


"BCCW Shoot Fight" = pro wrestling drama within the confines of a 5 round (3 minute round) affair. Gives the bad guys plenty of close calls and "saved by the whistle" drama. Major MMA entrances for both men - Shamrock with his entourage, and Severn all alone (his Shooters Club camp decimated by GDT Inc attacks). Emphasis on strong style, suplexes and chain wrestling. On commentary, MSD and Striker dissect how Maeda's tactics and training have benefited Shamrock in the fight. Maeda not only taught the art of judo to Carlos Gracie, but also taught a particular philosophy about the nature of combat based on his travels competing and training alongside catch-wrestlers, boxers, savate fighters, and various other martial artists. Maeda's theory said that physical combat could be broken down into distinct phases, such as the striking phase, the grappling phase, the ground phase, and so on. Thus, it was a smart fighter's task to keep the fight located in the phase of combat that best suited his own strengths. But despite all that, Shamrock's inflated physique is still no match for the Beast when it comes to power exchanges. In the 4th round, Shamrock wins the match with a sneak roll-up + holding the tights. All despite allegations of greasing in between rounds and using a foreign object handed to him by Maeda in the 3rd round. After the decision is announced, Severn snaps and suplexes the shit out of Shamrocks entire entourage (including Maeda in the final climatic toss), but Shamrock escapes the ring and the two men continue to stare daggers at each other.


Winner: KEN SHAMROCK

(BCCW Shoot Fight)
MAIN EVENT
CENATION IMMORTALS (John Cena & Hulk Hogan)

versus

HENCHMEN (One Man Gang & The Berzerker)
versus


Good old fashioned 1980's styled main event. Monster heels, monster faces (although Cena gets his share of lewd opposing chants). Cena plays the face-in-peril until Hogan gets the ring-clearing tag. Stereo body slams, followed by a legdrop/5-knuckle shuffle combo get the dual pinfalls. Mega Maniacs win!!! Cena and Hogan pose in the ring to end the show and send everybody home happy.


Winners: JOHN CENA & HULK HOGAN



CREDITS


ALEX RILEY: NXT Interview
DAVID OTUNGA: NXT Interview

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